Feb. 8, 2000 - Tuesday
OK, I can see now that life is about to change because of the baby. I don’t
think it happened immediately for me, as is the stereotype, because Harry’s
mother has been home on maternity leave and that’s allowed me to continue
to do much of the same as before. Sure, I’ve gone home almost every day
for lunch and gotten less work done, but I’ve always had work flexibility
and I’ve just been taking advantage of that a little more than usual. It’s
true that Harry’s mother and I haven’t been out to the movies or to
a restaurant since he was born, but we have had guests for dinner and gone to
others’ houses and that has maintained some normalcy. The trick, however,
is that Harry’s always been with us.
Last night, Harry’s mother and I attended a chamber music concert –
something we’d done regularly in the past - and needed to arrange babysitting
with Harry’s grandmother. All went smoothly and grandma seemed to enjoy
being with Harry. But the logistics game has begun. Actually, it started last
Friday when I was out of town and Harry’s mother needed to go into work
briefly. Harry’s grandfather babysat for a couple of hours and had no reported
difficulties.
The real challenge started today as Harry’s mother went to work again for
the entire afternoon and will start daily part-time this Friday. I will be the
one with Harry and was home with him this afternoon. We think avoiding daycare
is worth trying, especially since Harry is starting to interact and, we think,
needs the stimulus. And, of course, we love being with him. However, the concept
of getting work done at home while looking after Harry seems a lot more questionable
now that it did a few weeks ago in theory. In 4.5 hours this afternoon, I was
barely able to check my email. I did strap Harry in a front-side infant carrier
and did get some physical work done around the house, but the making money kind
of work was minimal and unless Harry starts taking more naps, I’m going
to have to rethink my work plan.
Appointments now are also a logistical puzzle since I’ll need to work everything
out in advance with Harry’s mother. I’m well aware that this is the
struggle virtually all parents face, but here it is for us. The free flowing,
carefree "sure, I’ll take a couple hours off to play tennis"
lifestyle seems to be compromised and real life has begun.
