March 15, 2002 - Friday
This evening at dinner while Harry was eating dessert raisins I tipped the container toward myself and grabbed a few. Harry, always interested in eating straight from the biggest containers, immediately reacted with "don't take away, don't take away from Harry, don't take it away from me." It's a typical sentiment from a two-year old and it came in a rapid cycle of words that show Harry was trying to be as clear and articulate as possible about his intentions. And, it's nice that he's learning word patterns, even under such pressure. However, we also need to reinforce good behavioral habits, so I talked to him a little about sharing. Again, seemingly trying to show he is learning, Harry immediately put a few raisins down on my side of the table. It was a nice gesture, but one I'm sure he also realized meant that I would not have to encroach upon his big container.

All that effort to share was promising, even if it was enlightened self-interest. Figuring it out was was also pretty straightforward, but I'm not sure quite what to think about what happened next. His mother asked for some raisins and Harry refused. Of course, that's not so strange by itself, but then he stated that he would share more with daddy and did so, putting down more raisins on my side. When mommy and I both said he should share with everyone, Harry offered a raisin to Jeremy, seated on his mother's lab, but continued to refuse mommy.

Now, where she to have been overly strict about something earlier in the day, or had she been mad with Harry, I wouldn't have thought twice about it. But, I was the one who had been a been angry earlier while she had been at work all day, having just returned at dinner time. I had thought initially that he was focusing on sharing with me to make up for getting me mad, but then there was sharing Jeremy and his overt refusal of mommy. In hindsight, I suppose mommy's day long desertion itself might have been Harry's reason for his discourteousness, but as I sat there it occurred to me that Harry was forming some strategy that I couldn't figure out and I haven't felt that way before with him. And, with that, Harry is yet another step closer toward independence.


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