August 13, 2003 - Wednesday
A couple of weeks ago the boys and I were driving in the car and we went passed a golf course. Harry, not understanding the difference between that and the golf courses he's used to playing, he decided it was the place to go.
"Dad, I want to go to the golf course." But, then he added this turning to his brother, "Jeremy did you want to go to the golf course?"

I suppose on the one hand this could be a very sweet and thoughtful brotherly gesture. Unfortunately, Jeremy's inarticulate response is straight ahead toddler excitement, complete with grunting and arms flailing. It's unfortunate because, of course, we were not going to this adult golf course any time soon and that would only make Jeremy mad.

The thing is that this was not an isolated incident with Harry trying to get Jeremy's backing for something.
"I want some candy," he'll say to his mother or me, then add before we answer, "Jeremy, did you want some candy."
Sometimes he'll get Jeremy's input after mine.
"I want to go to the tubes and the slides," he'll say.
"No, Harry, I'm afraid we can't go there today."
" Jeremy did you want to go to the tubes and the slides?"

We've tried to convince him that this sort of leading Jeremy on is not very nice, but we have had little success. Either it's a completely mixed message - be nice to and share with your brother, but don't ask for his opinion - or he's just using Jeremy to get want he wants. Of course, when he does it, it always seems like the latter on the surface and it's easy to get mad about it. But, there's just no way to know. Maybe we ought to be praising him every time, but then there's Jeremy to deal with, all worked up and expecting something he's not going to get.


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