December 13, 2005 - Tuesday
I went to get Harry for early dismissal as planned and, sure enough, he came running out of the classroom with a big smile, no doubt feeling like a big shot. More amazingly, Harry actually seemed to be very excited about his dentist appointment today, actually wanting to go. I suppose it's possible that he's just playing that adolescent game of liking what most other people don't just to be different, but I don't think Harry knows that most people don't like to go to the dentist. It's even more surprising because Harry has had two fillings already. The first wasn't bad, and he got lots of praise for being so brave, but the second was particularly awkward. Perhaps it's just that he continues to find strength in showing Jeremy, who is certainly less comfortable, the way things are at the dentists. Harry says it's because of the big balloons they get.

After the dentist appointments I took the boys to my parents house, the house I grew up in, for what will probably be the last time. They have built their new house and are clearing everything out of the old one and today I finished cleaning out my old room. Harry and Jeremy both found some things that they thought were cool. There was also a lot that I threw in the dumpster, including lots of stuff I was saving for later but later never came. I guess that's a father's trait, actually their grandmother's trait, that I'll want to guard against in Harry and Jeremy.

I can't say that leaving my childhood room for the last time was overly emotiomal, although I'd be lying if I did take a long look at that 14x12 piece of floor with yellow and blue check wallpaper. I obviously spent a lot of time there, both happy and sad those times are important. Of course, the basement, where I spent hours bouncing a ping-pong ball against the one-side-up ping-pong table, may be equally so, as is the yard where I practicing sliding, hit golf balls, and batted tennis balls over the roof. But I guess over the years I've come to understand that change happens whether we're ready for it or not. Rather than leaving my own room, I was more taken aback at all the stuff to which my mother seemed so burdensomely attached, accumulated over 40 years in the house, that really shouldn't have caused so much ado. After all, one of the main reasons for leaving this house was to get rid of all that stuff. But she is a chlid of a different era.

Ultimately, on this afternoon I was more concerned that Jeremy had an accident and didn't have any extra clothes with him. The most frustrating part, and I was indeed frustrated, was that Jeremy had been wiggling around for several minutes and I had asked him at least three or four times whether he needed to use the bathroom. He'd said no each time. When moments later the reality hit him he could not move fast enough toward the bathroom.


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